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I was lost

Updated: Dec 8, 2020

Ugh and double ugh.

I only wanted to create a site where I could show off my writing talent - whatever talent I have left. Writing has always been a part of my life, a hobby I could never get rid of even if I wanted to kick it in the balls. But I spent too many days and too many nights telling myself that I had one hell of a writer's block, which seemed to last forever... "Daphne, you no longer have the knack for writing!" Miraculously, I think that word best describes the 13th of November when I "miraculously" began writing again. A new thought had been born inside this brain of mine, where its creative side had laid dormant for years - Uranus. Yes, the planet Uranus (you naughty girl) had set foot in my mind, like it were Apollo 11 landing on the moon for the first time.

What the hell am I gonna do with Uranus?

Shockingly, writing about Uranus was much easier than I imagined. All I did was tilt my head to one side, and voila, the words swam through my brain cells faster than Superman would if he could. It's so easy to speak your mind when you despise someone so much, and yes, Uranus is all about a particular person that I loathe with all my nasty heart. However, amidst all the nastiness I feel for "it," I applaud "it." If not for "its" existence, I would still be huddled in this dark corner of mine, where every letter of the alphabet is blocked by a force known to man as the writer's block.

Ugh and double ugh... I did not forget about that. I'm not quite sure how I ended up having a blog page. I was busy editing my Wix site's homepage, happily turning the page around in circles - a bit confusing, but I could handle it. Oh yes, I could handle a simple site until I saw that I somehow managed to get myself a blog. A blog. A blog? Not a problem, I thought to myself - you, my dear blog, will be deleted! But my hand tends to have a mind on its own at times, and just as I was about to click "delete," my hand paused and told my brain to keep the blog.

What will I do with a blog? What will I say? Will people read it? Why does it say that there are 4 viewers already? Now, this is where the double ugh come in. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to write. These thoughts ran like a crazy madman in my head for many minutes and many more minutes. Think girl; I kept telling myself. But how could I make my creative side do its thing when I am at work right this very minute? I am supposed to be working - sending out commission statements and counting numbers in my head until it's time for me to say, "Thank God it's Friday."

I paused for a while. I paused a little bit more.

Just speak my mind. Forget about filtering my thoughts. Be true to myself and write - one word after another, YOU CAN DO IT! Wait a minute, I just remembered Rob Schneider with his "you can do it," and his voice is now stuck in my head. Ha, haha.

I no longer feel lost. I just changed my blog title to "I was lost." I should have changed it to "I found myself, again," but I'm not feeling too corny right now. Therefore, "I was lost" would suffice as my very first blog title.

I now have my own blog.

Yay and double yay.

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